Missionary Single Issues: Sexual Fantasy

  • Approximate Time Commitment: 20 minutes

These booklets cover those issues which are unique to or heightened by those individuals who live in a culture other than their passport culture. The author wrote it, not as one who lived as a single missionary, but as someone who has talked about singles issues with single missionaries.

Modern Western Culture presents serious challenges related to maturity, marriage, and family. Changes in the culture during the last couple of centuries have produced disturbing trends which relate to the singles (unmarried individuals) growing up in it.


Resource Description


As Bill was teaching a group of youth about modesty, one of the unmarried young women who had a child opened her blouse and began nursing the baby with her breasts in plain sight.  Bill knew that his host country had different standards, but he had not expected this right here in the church, and he could not keep his mind from wandering.

As Mary was walking along the street, a man coming toward her unzipped his pants, turned toward the building and urinated in plain sight.  She thought she was prepared for anything, but this sudden frontal nudity made it hard to control her thoughts.  Back home the man would be charged with indecent exposure.

While getting some R & R on a “family friendly” beach, a group of single missionaries saw several women in topless swimming suits and couples wearing little and touching each other all over.

Thoughts following such incidents are real and very important issues in the lives of single missionaries.  Here are some questions that need answering.

Doesn’t everyone think about sex?

Perhaps not all singles daydream about sex, but almost all do.  Way back in the 1930s two psychologists asked nearly 200 single college students if they had ever daydreamed about certain topics and if they had recently done so.  Sex was near the top of the list, and there was little difference between the men and the women.  Among the men, 97% reported having had sexual daydreams, and among the women 96% reported having had them.

Only three or four percent reported not having sexual daydreams in those days before television, the internet, and DVDs were available.  Research shows that such fantasy certainly has not decreased since then!  There probably are a few people who have little or no interest in sex, but the vast majority of people, including single missionaries, do think about it.


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